MY LOVE (A NIGHTMARE) | Michael Estabrook
I left home to go on a trip somewhere, not sure where, but I drove off-road, over rough terrain, over rutted, dusty, dirt roads, through gullies and rivers. But then my car (I think it was my son’s Jeep) got stuck in a muddy ditch so I decided to abandon the trip (and the car apparently) and go back home to get help. I began hiking back, walking stick, backpack and all. I don’t think it was too far, maybe half a day’s journey, trudging over hills, through underbrush, avoiding rivers and mud and swamps. At one point I recall coming upon a little pond of clear water with a bunch of turtles swimming around in it, and picked up a little snapper by his tail and considered (for only a moment) whether to bring him home and set him up in a tank like I had done so many year ago with another little snapper (which I named Grendal) I had rescued while I was in graduate school.
I continued my journey and arrived home around dusk. I thought I would surprise my wife so slipped quietly into our house. It was a big old house of two stories and lots of rooms. I sneaked up the stairs and heard her in her office on the phone. I listened at the door as she made plans to meet someone, maybe even go off for a little trip of her own while I was away. I could tell she was talking to a man, excited but guarded too, as she planned her rendous vous. She was almost whispering even though she thought was all alone in the house.
“I’m not sure how long he will be away.”
“Of course I want to see you, I told you that.”
“Yes, I will go away with you but I need to be careful.”
“I’m not sure what I will say to him or when.”
“I don’t want to hurt him any more than he will be by all this.”
“No, I’m not comfortable with you coming here.”
“All right, I’ll meet you, just let me get a few things together.”
“Yes of course, I love you too, bye my love.”
She hangs up the phone as my heart sinks to the very bottom of my being. My worst fear coming true, my worst nightmare, my beautiful wife in love with another man, going off with another man. And I simply do not know what to do. I’m paralyzed standing there outside her door. I guess in a way I’ve always been outside her door. She opens the door quickly and almost walks right into me. She’s completely startled, her eyes wide open, her mouth open too. She stands there frozen, speechless, staring at me and all I can think to say is, “You always called me ‘my love,’ did you have to call him that too?”
I left home to go on a trip somewhere, not sure where, but I drove off-road, over rough terrain, over rutted, dusty, dirt roads, through gullies and rivers. But then my car (I think it was my son’s Jeep) got stuck in a muddy ditch so I decided to abandon the trip (and the car apparently) and go back home to get help. I began hiking back, walking stick, backpack and all. I don’t think it was too far, maybe half a day’s journey, trudging over hills, through underbrush, avoiding rivers and mud and swamps. At one point I recall coming upon a little pond of clear water with a bunch of turtles swimming around in it, and picked up a little snapper by his tail and considered (for only a moment) whether to bring him home and set him up in a tank like I had done so many year ago with another little snapper (which I named Grendal) I had rescued while I was in graduate school.
I continued my journey and arrived home around dusk. I thought I would surprise my wife so slipped quietly into our house. It was a big old house of two stories and lots of rooms. I sneaked up the stairs and heard her in her office on the phone. I listened at the door as she made plans to meet someone, maybe even go off for a little trip of her own while I was away. I could tell she was talking to a man, excited but guarded too, as she planned her rendous vous. She was almost whispering even though she thought was all alone in the house.
“I’m not sure how long he will be away.”
“Of course I want to see you, I told you that.”
“Yes, I will go away with you but I need to be careful.”
“I’m not sure what I will say to him or when.”
“I don’t want to hurt him any more than he will be by all this.”
“No, I’m not comfortable with you coming here.”
“All right, I’ll meet you, just let me get a few things together.”
“Yes of course, I love you too, bye my love.”
She hangs up the phone as my heart sinks to the very bottom of my being. My worst fear coming true, my worst nightmare, my beautiful wife in love with another man, going off with another man. And I simply do not know what to do. I’m paralyzed standing there outside her door. I guess in a way I’ve always been outside her door. She opens the door quickly and almost walks right into me. She’s completely startled, her eyes wide open, her mouth open too. She stands there frozen, speechless, staring at me and all I can think to say is, “You always called me ‘my love,’ did you have to call him that too?”